Mary-Kate Meets Machiavelli

Could Mary-Kate Olsen’s bout with anorexia actually be a well designed career move?

The recent deluge of Mary-Kate related notoriety has suddenly elevated her status from merely “Twin” to “Main Twin.” This very alpha behavior sets the stage for the previously suggested cannibalization of her sister. The Weaker Twin’s only real choice for survival is a deep plunge into eccentric seclusion. Prepare for a future as a footnote in entertainment history, Ashley.

In related Olsen news, Santa Clause 2 star Tim Allen talks to Entertainment Tonight about the stress of being a famous twin:

They've been under such tremendous pressure," says longtime friend Tim Allen. "I always think it's too bad artists have to be displayed in public, but she did it with class. She's a young girl. [She's] got a lot of future ahead of her and really good support personnel around her."

Longtime friend? Since when are the Twins chumming around with Tim Allen? Who did he fuck to get Olsen access?