Now All We Need is Jessica Simpson

Jessica Simpson could make the Amish bigger than Kabbalah.

Look out Madonna. Kabbalah is dangerously close to being deader than Scientology. The hot new religious sect churning Tinsel Town’s butter these days are the Amish.

On July 28th, the UPN will debut Amish in the City, a reality television series that features five Amish youth sharing a house in the Hollywood Hills.

Over the span of eight weeks, the Amish participants, ages 18 to 24, will participate in various activities that range from working with the mentally challenged to spending time in the inner city. But altruistic endeavors won’t be the only thing on their humble minds:

Their roommates include a handsome swim instructor, a fashion-conscious "party girl," a nightclub promoter and an aspiring musician who works part time as a bus boy, the network said.

Potential sound bite from the ubiquitous reality TV show hot tub scene: Thou doth raised my barn.